..........Friday Funnies.

"Dick Cheney had an awkward moment tonight at the White House Halloween party. He went dressed as Darth Vader, and while at the party, he ran into the real Darth Vader who was dressed as Dick Cheney." --Jay Leno

"Anybody here for the marathon this Sunday in New York City, the annual marathon. What a tremendous event, like 40,000 runners. And you know they have to have about 400 portable toilets along the route of the marathon. You know what portable toilets are, as Larry Craig told us, they're singles bars." --David Letterman

"How 'bout this? Alex Rodriguez is not returning to the New York Yankees. The announcement was made at a fake FEMA press conference. ... FEMA faked a press conference and earlier today, President Bush strongly condemned it at his own fake press conference." --David Letterman

"Good news for the terrorists: Undercover agents posing as passengers were able to get simulated bombs through the screening process here at LAX 75% of the time ... but not one drop of shampoo." --Bill Maher

"The Turkish Parliament has voted to approve the idea of invading Iraq. President Bush was furious. He said, 'What kind of country takes a vote before it invades Iraq?'" --Bill Maher

"Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger is in a little trouble this week, little trouble for saying marijuana is not a drug, it is a leaf, it is a plant. He said marijuana is not a drug and today his approval rating in California, 99.99%" --Jay Leno